“We’re just going to have to agree to disagree.”
Have you ever had a discussion with someone over a particular issue that ended with those words? I know I have. Whether due to our upbringing, our culture, or our experiences, our unique perspectives will sometimes hinder us from agreeing with one another. There are over 8 billion people in the world, and, I dare say, there isn’t a single one of us who perfectly agrees with another on everything. Sometimes peaceful, patient, and loving discussions can lead to agreement, but sometimes they don’t. Sometimes the only way forward is to agree to disagree.
But what about Christians? What about followers of Jesus who disagree on how to correctly interpret the inspired Scriptures? Can Christians disagree? Or is it necessary that we come to perfect agreement? I think the answer to both of these questions is “Yes”. There are times when it’s okay to agree to disagree, and there are times when it’s not. There are “essential” things we must believe and practice to be faithful followers of Jesus, and there are “non-essential” things that we may disagree on without our faithfulness to Jesus being jeopardized.
“Okay, Jon, what are the things we can and cannot ‘agree to disagree’ on?” Well, that’s a bit tricky. If you and I were to sit down and write out an exhaustive list of what we believe are the “essentials” and “non-essentials”, we’d likely find that our lists aren’t exactly the same. Sure, we’d probably agree on several things. Things in which the Scriptures are more explicit and unambiguous (ex. Yahweh is the only true and living God, Jesus is the resurrected Son of God and Messiah, the Scriptures are inspired by God, etc.) But, who’s to say we’ll agree on what is explicit and what isn’t? What you consider crystal clear in the Scriptures, I may consider to be quite unclear. You may confidently place something on your “essentials” list that I confidently place on my “non-essentials” list.
So the question becomes, who gets to decide what is essential and what isn’t? Who gets to decide what is necessary for us to agree upon? If your immediate, gut-reaction answer to that question is “God”, then I agree with you. But that doesn’t really get us anywhere. We both agree (I assume) that Scripture (God’s Word) is objective truth. That is to say, there is a correct way to interpret everything we read in the Bible. But the problem is, how do we know if our interpretation is correct? Some texts and topics can seem pretty straight-forward, but there are others that are much more difficult to interpret. Even the greatest of biblical scholars come to different conclusions on any number of biblical texts and topics.
Realistically, any route you try to take to mend this dilemma is going to lead back to this fact: Christians are going to disagree with one another from time to time. We’re going to come to different conclusions based upon our individual study of the Scriptures, and that doesn’t always mean someone’s salvation is in jeopardy (Romans 14). That also doesn’t mean there is no objective truth. It simply means that, despite our best efforts, even the most sincere and studious Christians don’t always get everything “right”.
So, the proper question isn’t, “CAN Christians disagree?”. That has always been the case and always will be. The proper question is:
“HOW should Christians disagree?”
Paul dedicated the first half of his letter to the Ephesians to the wonderful “mystery of Christ.” (Eph. 3:4) “This mystery is that through the gospel the Gentiles are heirs together with Israel, members together of one body, and sharers together in the promise in Christ Jesus.” (Eph. 3:6) Jews and Gentiles (non-Jews) are now one big family in Christ. Gentiles were no longer “separate from Christ, excluded from citizenship in Israel and foreigners to the covenants of the promise, without hope and without God in the world.” (Eph. 2:12)
But to assume that they became one big HAPPY family would be to ignore the major cultural and religious differences that existed between Jews and Gentiles. This would take a lot of work from both sides to achieve the unity that Jesus desires in His kingdom. To say that these new Jewish and Gentile Christians would have a hard time agreeing on numerous things would be an understatement. Both sides had come from years of religious tradition. And if we know anything about religious traditions, it’s that they’re not easily discarded.
Thankfully, for their sake and for ours, Paul urges the Ephesians toward unity with these words:
Ephesians 4:2–3 (NIV)
Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.
Here’s how Christians should disagree:
- Be humble enough to say, “I could be wrong.”
- Be gentle enough to say, “I’m willing to listen and change.”
- Be patient enough to say, “I’ll give you time to consider my position.”
- Love them enough to say, “Even if we can’t come to an agreement, you’re still my brother/sister, and I’m not going to let this disagreement change that.”
- Be so eager to have peace that you say, “Let’s not allow this disagreement to come between the sibling bond that Jesus has given us.”
Unity Doesn’t Demand Uniformity
We often make the mistake of assuming unity can only be achieved through uniformity. We think, “In order for us to be one we must all be the same.” That’s simply not true, and it’s certainly not Scriptural. Never once were the 1st century Christians expected to be in perfect agreement on all things. God didn’t create the church to be a community of clones. God created the church to be a community of people who, out of love for one another, are determined to have unity despite their differences.
There’s nothing wrong with Christians politely debating, arguing, and discussing our different opinions and convictions. In fact, I don’t just believe it’s okay if we do, I believe it’s crucial. There can be no edification or growth where there is no exchange of ideas, opinions, and convictions.
Conclusion
Can Christians agree to disagree? I believe there are occasions in which we must. But that isn’t an excuse to settle into our convictions and abandon a pursuit of truth (or approve of others who do so). Instead, we need to encourage an atmosphere of humility, gentleness, patience, love, peace, and unity. An environment where Christians can discuss their convictions, edify one another, grow to a greater knowledge of Jesus, and respectfully disagree without the thought of division.
Addendum
If you’re interested in an “Essentials” list of things we as Christians MUST agree on, I’d like to point you to an inspired one:
Ephesians 4:4–6 (NIV)
There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called; one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.
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